Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Why corporate America sucks.

I hate working for a big company. I hate it even more that I can't mention them by name on my blog for fear of some pencil pushing, humorless suit with an attitide googling said company and coming across my blog. I've been telling myself that the job with the fictional "carmart" from the cartoon is only a temporary fix, that my real career lies elsewhere, and that my destiny is larger than the aches and pains I wake up with due to the physical demands of the job.

I hate whining... but get the cheese ready, cause here we go...

My biggest problem with the "Carmart" is that they lied to me when I was hired.

The Lie:"You will be eligable for the company health plan after 90 days" Wrong-o. it should have been "you're eligable for the company's ACCIDENT policy after 90 days. We don't do medical coverage until after you've been here for a year."

A YEAR!

(fume fume fume)

So, I tell my boss that ain't cool with the Kahunah. I need to start looking for another job, particularly since the job is a lot more stressful than what I signed on for. She calls the District manager and pleads my case, passionately enough that the man comes down from the corporate office to talk to me in person.

The conversation went something like this:

Rob: "I need health insurance"

Smarmy, glad-handing asshole: "No can do. But you're not seeing the big picture."

R: "The big picture is that I'm 36 and can't go for a physical without taking out a bank loan."

SGHA: "Your supervisor says you have potential... suppose I fast-track you for management?"

R: "I don't want to be a manager. Too much stress."

SGHA: "Only for managers without your potential. You can grow with our company."

R: "This does not change the fact that I have no health coverage."

SGHA: "What if I give you a raise?"

R: "What if you give me medical coverage and we call it a day?"

SGHA: "come now... I can give you two bucks more per hour, and after a year, you'll be running your own store."

At this point, God help me... I actually considered it. BUT THEN HE SAYS:

"And all you have to do is eat better and exercise more for a year until you get the health coverage."

GRRRRRRRR. Talk about pushing exactly the wrong button.

I started my job hunt in earnest today. Screw "Carmart" and everything they stand for.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ugh. SUCK. I'm so sorry to hear that the job isn't working out. Come back and work for Aid Auto. *smirk* Heh heh.

I made it unscathed through the first round of base layoffs here, which was an utterly stressful week. I am still taking classes but trying to be as proactive as possible with gearing myself up for a career change by volunteering for MAD CRAZY SHIFTS at the Tribeca Film Fest. I just posted my schedule on my blog. I'll sleep when I'm dead, dammit!

Whatever it takes to get into a line of work that I'll be happy in.

I've got my fingers crossed for you! I hope you find a company that treats you with the respect and dignity you deserve.

...fast track to management indeed. LOL.

Brou HahHah said...

Have you ever looked into getting health insurance for yourself? You'd be amazed at the premiums from, say, Blue Cross. Yeah man, welcome to the wacky world of retail.

I second Becca's statement abut that "fast track to management" stuff. THHHPPPPTTTT. If I had a dollar for everytime I've heard that, I could buy you both lunch. Somewhere nice.

angie. said...

What a total azz that guy was! He says you're not seeing the big picture, HAH! He's not seeing the big picture!

Though on the good side, look at the lengths they went at to make you stay. They brought out the "big guns"...okay, a "medium sized can the do the job okay" guns, but still....

Angie

Brou HahHah said...

Dude, you really need to get a "spam protector" on your blog comments page. Where did that "Bo Chen" guy come from? All you wanted was a lil' insurance!

Anonymous said...

Apparently, Bo Chen signed up to blogger yesterday, posted that mess, and the copied it and re-posted it in your blog Rob. Doesn't look like he has any previous archived posts or anything. Get a load out of the title of his blog.

*sigh*

Stacey said...

Bo Chen spammed me too, and I have every spam protection that blogger offers.

Carmart should definitely not have misled you when you started there, that sucks. Make haste, and get thee another job. Or use their initial lie as leverage. You can't depend on luck to get you through a whole year without insurance.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that place sucks and I hope you find another job soon !!

Melinda said...

Total suckage and way less than you deserve. Carmart can kiss my ass. But hey, I may need a bodyguard soon; sooooooo, if you're willing to work for a spot on my couch and some cheesy fries, I've got just the job for you. If you do a good job, I'll throw in weekly all-you-can-eat Chinese benefits.

Anonymous said...

omg that was so funny, oh and thanks for the happy birthday. Your true friends always remember.