Friday, June 29, 2007
I give her two weeks, tops.
Q: How was this week like the month of August, 1944?
A: Paris was liberated.
Nyuck, Nyuck Nyuck.
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
I confess to a love of the theatre... more so to a love of musicals. But sadly, I have never been able to afford tickets to a Broadway show. I actually considered shelling out the month's rent it would have taken for me and a friend to go see the original cast of Spamalot, but decided that having a roof over my head was slightly more important.
THIS, however... I will gladly give my left arm, my first born, and a significant portion of my frontal lobe to go see. I am a huge fan of the movie and it's creator... and that alone is reason enough.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Palpatine and Luke in a "Yo Mama" Contest
Am I the only one that thought the joke that ends the contest is funny as hell?
The Giant Worm orders chinese
The accents are of course what makes this funny...
and of course:
Death Star orientation
Which, for some reason reminded me of my buddy Dave.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
The following things do not bother me in the slightest...
1) When my boss shows up with 10 pounds of these:and invites us all to partake of them for lunch. Sure beats Burger King.
2)My staple remover:
despite the fact that it's obviously broken it's the best staple remover I've ever had, and the fact that it's broken doesn't bother me in the slightest. What does bother me is that I get asked once a month why I haven't replaced it.
3) Previews of coming attractions. In fact, I love the previews before the movie begins so much that it drives Dizzy nuts that I always insist on not missing them. It's also the one feature I always look to be included when buying a new DVD.
4) Kids that ask questions. While seated next to a koi pond at a chinese food place the other day a ten year old that was trying to see if goldfish liked fortune cookies asked me if I knew why they had a pond in the middle of the restaurant. I happily answered with everything I knew about how and why oriental cultures find fish to be good luck. Expanding a young mind feels good.
5) When someone buys me a beer. Or food. Or a houseboat. So you know... feel free if the mood strikes you.
6) Being hugged. (Although rumors abound that I hate it when people hug me)
7) Being tagged for memes (I don't always have the time to do them, but I generally enjoy anything that forces me to write)
8) Spelling mistakes. Bad grammar however, really pisses me off to the point where there are some blogs I simply won't read anymore because they are so badly written.
9) People that dislike me. Everyone's entitled to their opinion.
10) My weight.
11) Bad puns. Bad pranks are a different issue entirely.
12) Elvis Impersonators.
So, time to tag a few folk that almost never update their blogs:
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Friday, June 01, 2007
A trucker who has been out on the road for two weeks stops at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, "I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!"
The Madam is astonished. "But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal."
The trucker replies, "Listen Darlin, I ain't horny. I'm homesick."