Monday, March 24, 2008
"Okay, here's what we do. I'm going to go up onto your roof, and threaten the gorilla with this baseball bat until he falls down. When he falls down, this little dog will bite him in the balls until he's incapacitated."
"Great," says the man. "But what's the gun for?"
"In case I fall down instead of the gorilla -- shoot the dog."
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Friday, March 07, 2008
He asks the driver, "What's up with the penguins in the back seat?"
The man in the car says "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them, but I haven't had a clue."
The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo."
"Hey, that's a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away.
The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car.
"Hey, they're still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo."
"Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time. Today I am taking them to the beach."
Thursday, March 06, 2008
"Yes, no problem!" So the minister welcomes them to the church. Then he asks the middle aged couple the same question
"Well, after one week, the husband had to sleep on the couch, but we made it!" So the minister welcomes them to the church. Then the minister asks the newlywed couple if they had abstained from sex for two weeks.
"We were unable to abstain. On the third day, my wife dropped a can of corn and when she bent over to pick it up, LUST and PASSION overcame me!"
"I'm sorry," the minister says, "but you are both banned from this church!"
"That's okay," says the husband, "We were banned from the supermarket, too."
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
"Oh, no," said the priest, thinking of the most promiscuous women in town. "Was it with Marie Brown?"
"I'd rather not say who it was."
"Was it with Betty Smith?"
"I'd rather not say," says Joe. So the priest gives him absolution and Joe leaves. While leaving the church, Joe's friend asks if he received absolution.
"Yes, and two very good leads!"
Monday, March 03, 2008
I know that the resolution sucks, but if you look closely, you will see that the gentleman in the red and blue tie is Mr. Steve Scalise, candidate for my local congressional seat (left vacant when Bobby Jindal was made governor of Louisiana) . That's right... it's not just a bunch of dumbass volunteers waving furiously to keep from freezing on a blustery Louisiana morning... the actual CANDIDATE is out there with them, smiling and waving at passerby. I double checked this fact by looking at his website, and sure enough it was him.
It's refreshing that a candidate for public office is humble enough to actually stand side by side with those campaigning for him. It shows character and humility. The man's got my vote.
Of course, this is probably exactly why he did it, and I have just been manipulated royaly. Is it just me? Would this make a difference to you?
Being a Writer with a blog is very different from being a blogger that writes. While I love my blog in that it gives me a creative channel to use when I really, really need to write, it is also a bit of a distraction when I'm trying to write something more substantial. The short of it is that I'm working on something, and on top of it i've been buisier at work lately too, leaving me no time to blog. I'd love to hear from other writers that have blogs about how they manage it.
But enough excuses... How is everyone? I'm fine, if a little worn around the edges. I'm still working on how to manage to write ten pages a day while balancing family and work... but Silverfox has been really encouraging about my writing efforts and that helps a lot. It isn't easy being in love with a writer as I understand it... it's a fairly solitary thing for the most part, even when it seems like I'm napping on the couch, I'm really fitting plot details together like legos in my head to spit out onto the screen later. It's my process, and it works for me...but loved ones don't usually understand this. To much of the world, it seems i'm being lazy, or procrastinating... they offer platitudes about writers block, even though I sit there and assure them that when I'm ready to write it, I'll write it.
But not Silverfox. She's been extremely patient as she tries to get a grip on how I work on something like a screenplay. Yes, occasionally she'll chide me when she knows I'm putting off writing to spend time with the kids, but I can tell it's only cause she's worried that i'm not getting any "Me" time.
It's really kinda awsome :)
I have a lot more to talk about, so today may be a multiple entry day. We'll see how it all shapes up as my day progresses.