Friday, March 27, 2009


In the morning, after I've dropped off the kids at school, I usually find myself looking to score a bit of breakfast. While ideally this would mean some time spent lingering in a diner clacking happily away on my laptop while a delightfully haggard waitress brings me cup after cup of liquid peppiness, it usually means a quick spin through a drive through.

Near my home, there are basically three options for morning nourishment... The local Starbucks, with its overpriced mochafrappawhatsis and stale croissants, The local Burger King, and the local McDonalds. The BK and McD's stand nearly opposite each other on the main drag in our neighborhood, and one could almost imagine Ronald on the rooftop of one in a sentry tower, keeping a wary eye through binoculars on King Burger as he readies his seige catapult.

Lately for breakfast I've been favoring the King for two reasons... One, it's slightly cheaper, and two, they now have an iced mocha drink that is just as tasty as anything that Starbucks has to offer down the street. As the local McD's has yet to get on the bandwagon with the rollout of the corporations new gourmet coffee machines, I am left with little actual choice in the matter.

This morning, I roll up to BK and order a Sausage Croissant with egg combo, With hash browns and an Iced Mocha.

Hesitantly, a voice came back to me over the speaker saying, "I'm sorry, sir... but we're out of sausage. We only have bacon or ham right now."

"Okay... I'll just take bacon then."

Another pause... then, "We also have no hash browns this morning."

I was beging to feel a little discriminated against as I asked why.

"Well, the fire went out on the fryer, and we can't get it to come back on."

I thought about it for a second, imagining a guy sticking his head into the darkness under the fryer and lighting a match to see where the gas leak was, then decided I would go across the street to McD's instead. I got through to the second window at McDonalds without incident, but as the girl handed me my Egg McMuffin, I noticed a sign above her window.

The sign said "Picture and Braille menus available on request". Now I ask you dear reader, does the thought of this sign make your head want to explode like it did mine?

Fact one: This sign was situated in such a way that only the driver of an SUV could see it.
Fact two: The Blind rarely drive, and furthermore, can't actually see the sign.
Fact three: It's really doubtful that anyone that needs a picture menu would be able to read the sign.

Now tell me... Who in blazes is that sign for?


Andy said...

I could say something about the "law" requiring them to put such a sign up, however I will add a similar sign to the mix. Since living here in Orlando, my wife and I have visited the "Mouse House" on several occasions, and on one of those my wife pointed out a map for guests to see "where they are". Nothing special, just like the kind you see in a mall, however this one had braille on it... Now, if this map were in the front of the Magic Kingdom, I could see some sort of logic in this, but this map is right in the middle of the park. So if you're blind, you need to find your way from miles away in the parking lot, to the front gate, then to the middle of the park before you can figure out where you are! I would say get a dog, but it would probably eat the McMuffin...

Sondra LeBreton said...

Have you tried the Chateau cafe just down the street from y'all? It has great breakfasts and really good, reasonably priced gourmet (and regular) coffee drinks too. We usually hit them up for breakfast on Sundays before mass.