Thursday, March 02, 2006

"Texas: 32 electoral votes, another of the so-called big enchiladas... or if not a big enchilada, at least a huge taco."- Dan Rather

DOA management Rob update- Out of the corner, looking for his pants and some ranch dressing. We assume he will be back to writing form in a few days.

Dizzy's San Antonio adventure- part 3

When last we left our heroine, she was hungry and still quite agahst at the 2 1/2 hour wait at the local Dave and Busters. Still, with directions in hand, and the ever-popular Phred behind the wheel, the pair made their way to a resturant known as the "Magic Time Machine".

The resturant was unlike anything Dizzy expected. Each of the tables was done up in the decor of a different time period, and the waitstaff were all dressed as different pop culture icons. Their waitress was Velma from scooby doo, with Lilo and Stitch helping with the drinks.

Phred was delighted by this, and said that if Velma used the word "jinkeys" in a sentence, her tip would triple. Among the waiters was a very convincing Jack Sparrow, who at one point got into a bit of a tussle with Velma:

(Jack grabs Velma from behind)
Jack: Come on darling, let's not fight it anymore...
Velma: Jinkeys! a pirate!
Phred: She just earned her tip!
Jack: Now, now... don't be coy. Give us a kiss.
Velma: Don't you know that Velma has no interest in boys?
Jack: (to Dizzy) That's only cause she's never met a pirate like me.
Velma: At least not one that smelled as bad.
Jack: I can afford not to bathe. I work for Disney.

Jack then strutted off with a manly swagger. Velma followed, yelling that Hannah Barbera pays very well indeed.

The meal was excellent, and they made Dizzy the best Margarita that she had ever had. Afterwards, the pair returned to Dave and Busters to spend the evening playing video games and winning tickets for beer steins, coffee mugs, and shot glasses.

The next day, the pair went on a quest for chinese food, and their second hotel. Phred had booked them in a posh boutique hotel downtown for their last night, so that he wouldn't have to drive, and could thusly drink. They found a buffet on the outskirts of the city, and stumbled upon a flea market in the barrio. They wandered the booths for a bit, (Dizzy buying an oversized floppy camo hat), and then went to the new hotel. Their room had a balcony, turndown service, and even complimentary robes.

They then went to the Ripley's believe it or not museum, and the Wax museum, the more interesting of five tourist traps near the Alamo. (now only blocks from the hotel) they passed on the Davy Crockett's tall tales ride, because it looked phenomenonaly cheesy. Little did they know just how cheesy and stupid the Wax museum was. Grumbling about getting ripped off, they went down to the Riverwalk as the sun set, and took a river barge tour by moonlight.

Their guide was a funny guy, and made a few choice suggestions for Romantic-Yet-Reasonable places to eat and drink the night away. They went with the Mexican one for dinner, and then went to Dick's Last Resort, which had a live band and no cover. They also had a lobster tank with a claw (like those stuffed animals at the arcade) and if you caught a lobster, they would cook it for you.

Phred tried valiantly, (much to Dizzy's amusement), but the wily lobsters were too much for him. He gave up and just had another beer. They walked back to the hotel, weary, a little tipsy, and ready for the drive home the next day.

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